Life Update: Getting Back To Me

by - 18:09

 Barkby Beach, North Wales

As usual, time is flying on by (I can't believe we're already in March) and 2015 is shaping up to be a pretty decent year. This was always going to be a big year for me as it's the year that I finish uni - and my 17 years of education - and properly enter into the big ol' world of adulthood. Yikes. 

The last three years have been a true roller coaster for me and I've definitely experienced my fair share of both good and truly awful times. From failing modules in my second year of uni to having a total idiot moment and accidentally missing a flight because I went to the complete wrong airport, I've learnt a lot of lessons in my brief time as a young adult so far. I've also made some really good memories for myself like going on holidays with my boyfriend and my friends for the first time, buying myself nice things after working overtime to do so and also spending time focusing on and developing my interests and myself as a person.

I'm quite a self analytical person which can lead to mild anxiety at times but mostly just means I like to evaluate my decisions/actions/self in order to decide whether I'm growing into the person I want to become. Yesterday was International Women's Day and one thing that the most important woman in my life (my mumma) has taught me is that life is never going to be one, smooth path towards an ultimate destination. You will rarely be 100% on track but as long as you're regularly making minor adjustments to get you back in line with the path you'd like to be taking, you'll get there in the end. It also means that having days when you feel so de-motivated and like you're "off the rails" is okay, so long as you make the effort to eventually bring yourself back to where you ultimately want to be. On the other hand you can also have days where you feel like you've really made some headway in the work or self-development that you want to achieve which both makes you feel accomplished and like you've compensated for those few "off" days.

Right now, life for me is pretty amiable. Although my architecture course is as gruelling and intense as ever, I'm finally starting to see my grades match up with the amount of effort that I put in. Dave has found a place to live which means we both get our space back (he had been staying with me and my family since he found himself essentially homeless after his parents divorced last year) and we're having more quality time together. Although I really enjoyed working there, I've quit Starbucks so now I have more time to keep up with uni work, see my family and Dave and also have some chill time to myself. I've rediscovered some of my old hobbies again like doing Pilates and crafts so I'm starting to feel more like me again. I've also managed to regain some healthier eating habits as being so busy and stressed had caused me to eat way more junk/fast food than was good for me. 

I'm having far fewer "down" days and am managing to stay positive about more aspects of my life that used to really bother me before. Most of these changes stemmed from a long conversation with my mum after I had an emotional breakdown in front of her and she realised how much was bothering me that I wasn't talking about or was trying to deal with because I thought I could handle it. There's no shame in simplifying your life if it's defeating you - it is always much better to whole-ass one thing than half-ass two things. With her help I came up with a game plan to help me get back to a good place with my uni work, relationships and personal time. It's only been a month since that happened and I feel like I'm in a much stronger place that allows me to better tackle any challenges that may come my way.

That doesn't mean that I'm good-to-go for life now, it just means I've adapted to suit my environment and current situation. I'll probably have to tweak some elements of myself/life to keep up with the changes that are to come this year but I feel better prepared and more aware of what to keep an eye open for now in terms of signs that I'm not at my best; hopefully this means that I'll be able to reevaluate my life before it comes to another breakdown. I'm still young and I'm sure I'll have a lot more challenges to overcome as life goes on but for now, life is pretty sweet.

I hope you're all enjoying your Monday night and are as excited as I am about the prospect of Spring officially starting soon...I've missed those blue skies and flowers in bloom!

Stay inspired,

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  1. My setements exactly G. It takes a bit of darkness to make a strong woman find her personal strength. Glad things are looking up. Xox

    1. So true: it's the absolute pits as you're going through it but you do eventually come out the other side and feel much better for it. Thank you lovely :) xxx